Thursday, January 10, 2013

Dicks and other compelling reasons I love my gentleman friend

In the shopping center closest to my home, there is a Dick’s Sporting Goods. For those unfamiliar with the franchise, Dick’s is a national chain with more than 500 stores nationwide offering sporting equipment, apparel and footwear.

And the occasional good laugh, if you have a particular sense of humor.

Lucky for me, my gentleman friend does. Since Dick’s is adjacent to the grocery store we frequent, we drive by it several times a week. It never fails to amuse us.

“Did you hear Dick’s had a really big year?” he asked last weekend as we cruised through the parking lot. “Business has been growing like crazy for Dick’s.”

I gave a solemn nod and tried not to giggle. “It was such a hard year for a lot of retailers, so I’m glad Dick’s kept it up.”

“They’re facing some stiff competition these days. You’ve really gotta give Dick’s a hand.”

“Sales were actually sagging at the start to the year, but profits rose and Dick's finished on top with help from some corporate outreach,” I said.

“That and a little stroke of luck,” he agreed. “I like how their customer service isn’t too in-your-face.”

“I never come out of Dick's empty handed. My only beef is that their women’s apparel kinda sucks.”

“Oh, you should hop on the Dick’s website,” he said. “The selection is good, and their sale price on balls just dropped.”

Once our shopping was complete, we returned home and unloaded groceries as my gentleman friend’s offspring scurried upstairs to hang their coats.

“How much longer do you think we have before the kids catch on to the Dick’s jokes?” he whispered.

“Forever, I hope,” I replied. “Good use of longer, by the way. I almost didn't notice you worked that in there.”

“Thank you. Nice job with working that in there.”
I try.


Linda G. said...

LOL! We have Dick's Sporting Goods here, too. Though I've been known to refer to it as "Goods Sporting Dicks" on occasion. ;)

Patrick Alan said...

I'd say 8. My friend's son would ask when he was 8 where Tit's Sporting Goods store was.

Teri Anne Stanley said...

The offspring probably already "get it". They just have the good sense to wait until you're out of sight before they roll their eyes...

Candyland said...

We have a Dick's that fills our conversations with similar filth. We also have a Menard's. "Save big money with my nards."

Shalet Jimmy said...


Matthew MacNish said...

The best part of this is that I know you didn't make any of it up.

And I can't believe they have Menard's in Ohio, Candace! I miss Menard's. And Mill's Fleet Farm.

Judy, Judy, Judy said...

Okay that conversation just made my day.

Jessica Lemmon said...

Hahaha! I'm totally going to start playing that game with Mr. Lemmony!

Raley Blue said...

We have a Dick's in our mall too. About a year after we quit doing the jokes... our oldest son started doing them. The answer to that question is... Not as long as you think. ;)