Friday, October 22, 2010

My crush on the guy with the big probe

Thanks to everyone who participated in my “favorite place to be kissed” poll the last two days. Want to know what that was all about? You’ll have to stop by The Debutante Ball and read this week’s post.

Now that we got that out of the way, I have some exciting news – I get to go to the dentist this morning.

This fills my heart with joy like composite resin in a decaying tooth. I’ve been going to the same dentist for about nine years, and I’m not ashamed to admit I have a small crush on him.

OK, maybe I’m a little ashamed to admit it. It’ll be just my luck he’ll visit my blog today and will promptly transfer my records to one of the other dentists.

Honestly, it’s a harmless thing. He’s happily married, I’m happily married, and our contact is limited to him shoving his gloved hands in my mouth once every six months. Hardly the basis for a romantic tryst.

I will confess right now that the second romance novel I ever wrote had a hero who bore a striking resemblance to my dentist. The story is one of my abysmal early attempts, so there’s little risk it will ever find its way to the bookstore shelves where my dentist – who, naturally, would be browsing the romance aisle – would stumble upon it and bellow, “wait a minute, that’s me!”

That’s true for pretty much any character I write. People often ask me if I base characters on real people. The short answer is, “of course!”

The long answer is that my characters – especially the male love interests – are almost always an amalgam of many different people. I’ll borrow eyes from a guy I pass on the street, arms from some sexy stud I spot on the internet, a smile from my high school boyfriend. I’ve told my husband before that he’s the inspiration for every hero I’ll ever write, and while that’s true, I mean it more in a big picture “you’re the reason I believe in true love” sort of way.

But I’d be lying if I pretended little parts (and not-so-little parts) of other men don’t help form those characters.

Especially my dentist.

When I had a cavity filled several years ago, he dosed me liberally with laughing gas (knowing my crippling needle phobia and the likelihood I’d punch anyone who came near me with the Novocain.)

The whole thing is a blur to me, except the faint memory that I was very, very happy for the duration of the procedure.

I walked home afterward, and was still a little loopy when I strolled through the front door with a big, drooly smile on my face.

“You’re baked out of your gourd, aren’t you?” Pythagoras asked.

I grinned. “Uh-huh. Nitrous Oxide. Good stuff.”

“Please tell me you didn’t hit on the dentist.”

Truly, I have no idea. That’s probably best.

Have you ever developed a harmless crush on your doctor, dentist, or the clerk at the adult video store? Do any traces of these people appear in your novels? Please share.

I have to go primp for the dentist.

18 comments :

Janet Reid said...

I have a small crush (ok, not so small) on your husband. Does that count? Alas, I only write rants on my blogs, not novels, so Pythagoras is safe from appearing there!

Kari Lynn Dell said...

There was a really good looking ob/gyn in South Dakota. He drove a red classic Mustang with license plates that said, "I Deliver". There was no way I could let him see me in a paper poncho. I went to his homely older partner and drooled on the good looking one from the waiting room.

Rebecca Lynn said...

I had a huge crush on the surgeon who took out my gall bladder. And he wasn't even married (and I'm not married). In fact, I almost had to cancel the surgery because I didn't want him to see me naked. (Have I mentioned I'm also neurotic, and paranoid?)

But my romance heroes usually bear no resemblance to anyone I know. I'm afraid that people will read into it something that they shouldn't. (Or that they really should, only I don't want them to...)

Patty Blount said...

Jeesh, Janet, the line forms here!

Anyhow, sick as this may be, I had the teensiest crush on the doctor who delivered my son - right up until he delivered him.

Yeah, nothing like a little childbirth to kill the romance.

Linda G. said...

Well, you see, ever since you showed that picture of Pythag in his bicycle shorts...*cough*

I hear you about the laughing gas--great stuff. I have no fear of needles, but once, when I was having an abscessed wisdom tooth pulled, no amount of novocain would numb that sucker. The dentist suggested a few whiffs of gas would make me not care about the pain, and boy was he right! In fact, when he was done, I told him to go ahead and pull a few more while he was at it.

Sadly, the stuff wears off way too quickly.

Jeannie Moon said...

I told one of the orthopedists who was operating on me he was hot.

I was having my knee repaired, and my ortho had a solo practice and worked with another surgeon in town when they needed assisting surgeons. Now, Dr. Gorgeous (who was assisting) had treated my oldest daughter when she was nine. He's my age, and a former football jock who went to Harvard Med. Did I say he was movie-star handsome? Tall? Sweet? Great with kids? You get the idea.

I'd had a Valium or something that they gave me to calm my nerves and I was pretty loopy. Dr. Gorgeous was in the OR when they wheeled me in. I focused on those eyes and went to my happy place. He was chatting me up, asking about the kids and I just blurted out "You are just incredibly hot, you know that, right?"

It made him smile because even though he had a mask, his eyes showed it. The nurse in there giggled a little and then I turned to her and said, "Oh, come one. Don't tell me you all don't lust after him?" Looked back at Dr. Gorgeous, "Someday I'm going to make you a hero in a romance novel. Just wait."

The anesthesiologist, who is my best friend to this day, stopped me from talking anymore. He put the mask over my face and knocked me out. Thank God.

I was the talk of the surgical floor. As one nurse said, "You said all the things we've always thought." Fortunately, my husband was amused; Dr. Gorgeous checked on me and he thought I was funny. The only one who was mad was MY attending orthopedist. I think he was jealous.

Danica Avet said...

I had a total crush on my mom's doctor...he was the doctor who gave her a colonoscopy, which is really NOT romantic at all, but he had such beautiful blue eyes...I really don't remember much of what he said to me about her procedure, but she came out okay, so I guess it was all good. *sigh*

Elizabeth Ryann said...

So true. Nothing sexier than a bellowing dentist.

Matthew AT Banning said...

It's not so much that I end up writing about people I know (maybe I do a little bit ...). I usually write up a character and suddenly find I can match them up with someone I know, or meet!!!

Summer said...

The vision center I used to attend had a few doctors who rotated in and out, and one day when I went in to a checkup on my new glasses, I discovered that the optometrist of the day was ridiculously hot. So hot that I convinced myself that I didn't need my glasses adjusted, like I'd thought, and so hot that I could barely string three words together. It was fairly embarrassing, really.

Candyland said...

Oh just a young dr. once...but it got weird when I needed a breast exam:/

viewfromdownhere said...

I have to admit, I have a small harmless crush on one of the attorneys I work with on a regular basis. Tall, dark, handsome and smart...not bad to look at, and he might be making an appearance or two in one of my novels coming up...

Malin said...

I got a crush on the receptionist at my work.

On another note, I hate it when people ask me who I based my characters on. I never do that, and people always assume all writers do so and that naturally I'm writing about them (as it's mostly people I know who's asking).

lora96 said...

I had a crush on a college professor. He cropped up in an unpublished novel I wrote. Then when I saw him in the grocery store I couldn't even meet his eyes. I thought he would KNOW. :)

Jen Stayrook said...

Like the person above me, I had a crush on my college Spanish Professor. My husband still makes fun of me about it because well, the professor wasn't the most attractive man I've ever met. Or the second most attractive...or...you get the idea. But, he was funny and intelligent and those two traits work wonders on me.

I tend to have crushes on men who are happily married and have kids, not because I'm a sleazy home-wrecker, but because I find their dedication attractive. Without said family, they'd just be another guy.

Sydnee said...

I have a tendency for growing debilitating crushes on dudes way too old for me. In no particular order, I have had crushes on... my high school History teacher, my guitar tutor, my college Honors professor, any redheaded guy that walks by, any guy with blue eyes, joggers, construction workers, and Pythagoras. Qualities of all my crushes find their way into my main character... except P-Thag. I'll respectfully leave him to you. ;)

Tawna Fenske said...

Janet, don't worry, I have a crush on my husband, too. Perfectly normal.

Kari Lynn, now I'll never stop picturing you drooling in your paper poncho!

Rebecca, so he got to see you naked then? :)

Patty, nothing like an episiotomy to ruin the mood.

Linda G, the first time they dosed me with the laughing gas, they ended up giving me a bit too much. I was out of it for awhile!

Jeannie, OMG, that is a hilarious story!

Danica, I'm a sucker for beautiful blue eyes. And green ones. And brown ones. And...

Elizabeth, hey, "the bellowing dentist" sounds like a good name for a bar.

Matthew, several times I've written a character, pictured him/her in my mind, and then met the person in real life. Freaky when that happens!

Summer, wait, so he didn't adjust your glasses for you? That sounds like a bad euphemism.

Candyland, and by "weird" you mean "totally hot," right?

viewfromdownhere, careful with that! I once wrote a character that I named after a co-worker. I meant for him to be a minor character, but he ended up evolving into a love interest. I could never look at my co-worker the same way again!

Malin, since my characters are usually a blend of a dozen different people, I figure I'm safe :)

lora96, isn't that funny? You're thinking "I've seen you naked," and then you realize you haven't.

Jen, I've had a few of those -- the guy who is so not hot, but somehow still SOOOO hot. For me, it's a confidence thing. A mediocre looking guy who's comfortable in his skin and very confident is way hotter than an insecure handsome guy.

Sydnee, I used to have a thing for redheaded guys when I was young. Always thought I'd marry one!

Thanks for reading, guys!
Tawna

Christine said...

I adore my husband's orthopedic surgeon. He's tall, handsome, nice, talented and he gave my hubby a new hip. He even has a cool name. I think I go to the follow up appointments to see him, not to hear about my darling's recovery.