A man, if you must know. I know it’s a little soon after announcing my divorce to be sharing this, but you really can't dictate when you're going to find someone special.
I met him yesterday when I took some skirts to my favorite seamstress to be hemmed. There he was, standing by the door like he'd been waiting for me my whole life.
I know it sounds cliché, but it was love at first sight for both of us. His name is Ewan, and he's the most amazing man I've ever met. Would you like to see a photo?
I'm sure it's easy to see why I'm smitten. Right after we met, I posted his photo on Facebook and Twitter so friends and family could share in my joy. I was delighted to discover not only were people supportive, but eager to point out the advantages to having a romantic relationship with someone like Ewan.
- Since he has no arms, Ewan will never hold me back.
- Without feet, Ewan is unlikely to run away or step out on me.
- Ewan will never whine, belch, fart, curse in front of my grandmother, or say anything insulting.
- Ewan is always hard. Always.
- I can be certain Ewan is unarmed.
So what do you think of Ewan? Can you offer any additional commentary on the advantages of this new relationship? Please share!
Ewan and I will be over here gazing into each other's eyes while we hold hands.