Monday, October 24, 2011
It's definitely the last seasonal mow, and depending on how the impending home sale unfolds, perhaps the last time I'll ever mow it.
I'm not ashamed to tell you I have one of the ugliest lawns on the block. There are brown patches and uneven spots and more dandelions than I can count. If you held a contest for the crappiest grass, I would first question your soundness of judgment and inquire why you didn't hold a contest for the most wine bottles in the recycle bin, because I would totally rock that contest.
Then I'd have to admit that in a contest for the worst lawn, it would come down to a tie between my yard and the neighbor's.
And that's when I'd pull another bottle of wine out of the rack, walk next door to her house, and knock on her door. And when she answered, I would hand her the wine and say thank you.
Thank you for being a single, female homeowner who's somehow making it work. Thank you for wheeling your mower out time and again and coaxing it to life in the driveway. Thank you for mowing your ugly excuse for a lawn all by yourself, week after week, and inspiring me to do the same. Our yards might not be the nicest on the block, but they've been lovingly tended.
Then I would shake her hand and wish her a good evening.
OK, that's a lie. Secretly, I'd kinda hope she might invite me in to share the wine and maybe tell me that she's been inspired by my ugly excuse for a lawn and my steadfast determination to maintain it. Then we'd have a pillow fight in our underwear and make a bunch of risque jokes about "keeping the grass trimmed" and "getting a guy to help mow the lawn."
But since lawn mowing season has ended, I doubt that'll happen. For now, we'll stick with smiling and nodding when we pass each other at the mailbox.
Or maybe I'll throw in one butt pat, just for the sake of the sisterhood.
Have you ever found yourself inspired, moved, or encouraged by a random stranger? Ever felt camaraderie with someone you hardly know? Please share!
Or feel free to toss out a good lawn mowing or grass joke. That's good, too.
Posted by TAWNA FENSKE at 2:30 AM